Loving life in my early thirties, been enjoying married life for nearly 8 full years. I’m not old enough to be your momma, and I haven’t seen it all yet, but I’ve been where you’ve been. There you are daydreaming about your husband to be and anything that tickles or plays with the idea of that intrigues you. I remember the crushes too, the butterflies dancing in that tummy of yours when he walks by or when his eyes catch yours for half a second. The only man though who is guaranteed to never break your heart… to never lead you into a sin or snares, is Jesus. The Lord desires intimacy with you, so that He can keep you safe in every way, in every relationship, so that He may secure you and keep you from all the insecurity that leads us to sin. Marriage is just plain beautiful and to desire it is a good thing. But undisciplined desire opens us up to a world of trouble, and the enemy of our souls will do a terrible thing with it given access.

Knowing the precious God-given desire set divinely in your heart, Satan set up a media driven culture to steadily feed you lies until you might believe them. The enemy has this one rigged…. He’s a trickster, and there you are sitting in front of an abnormally large screen cheering for the things you should not, rooting for adultery (sex or emotional involvement with someone other than your husband), fornication (sex before marriage, including the foreplay that would lead up to this). The enemy knows if he can get you to cheer and hope for sinful outcomes (even if imagined), that he has set you firmly on the path of compromise. He’s hoping you will in fact compromise in your real life, because sexual sin does some damage that cannot be fully undone. It can always be forgiven, but never undone.

The images at the movies or on your iphone screen well up in your mind and once there seldom do they fade. Whether or not we want to admit it our tendency is to act on our meditations, to do the things we think about.

Too often, we are filling up our minds with what God calls immorality and still expecting to have lives and marriages full of purity.

It will not happen, because sexual immorality isn’t just something we do with our bodies, it’s something we do in our minds. Not one among us is perfect, all of us have fallen short, but the thing is if Jesus Christ is your Savior, we don’t have to keep falling for sin. We don’t have to keep going out with our flesh and doing what it tells us to do. We have opportunity to repent and reflect Christ.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Say NO to Fifty Shades of Grey, but say no to everything else just like it. Say NO to The Best of Me, say no to The Bachelor. If you have a penchant for romantic films, watch something redeeming like One Night with the King or The Song. If you want to read about romance open up Scripture and enjoy The Song of Solomon. It is crazy beautiful. Read Proverbs so you can avoid all manner of foolishness. The desire for romance set in us can be fulfilled in godly ways, in ways that promote purity, rather than stirring up ungodly passion.

Proverbs 31 contains this gorgeous description of a godly wife. And please note that a woman is to be like the excellent wife before she is the excellent wife.

She does him good, and not harm, ALL the days of her life. Proverbs 31:12

This Scripture is written to a young man in regards to what kind of wife he ought to find…meaning he doesn’t have one yet. You can be the kind of woman unveiled in Proverbs 31 NOW. You don’t have to wait for a ring to learn how to live out of the fear of the Lord. We are to bring our husbands, present or future, good all the days of our lives, not just the ones following the “I do.”

I have not read the book, but I’ve read synopses enough to know that the female protagonist in Fifty Shades of Grey is teaching you to be like the immoral woman depicted in Proverbs 7. She profanes the image of God and what it means to reflect God as female. The male protagonist does the same and should be nothing we desire. This is certainly not who we were created to be, so why spend hours of your time discovering all of her wickedness? This Sex in the City culture is leading your future marriage down a path of compromise, down a path that has at its end, much worse than a shattered heart, death itself. So, I agree with Paul…

Flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22