We sit together and dream a lot about all sorts of things. You should be a dreamer with your God and your husband. We can’t imagine what God has in store for us. With your husband you should talk all the time about everything. All sorts of things…how you want your children to grow in the Lord and be trained, how you desire to dig into the Holy Scriptures together, how you like his blue (or whatever color) eyes and how handsome he looks everyday…. How you talk to him, he will internalize, so speak wisdom and speak kindness, speak slow, less often, and well.

We’d talk future, envisioning our family…. He would ask me what kind of home I’d like to live in with all of these beautiful kids, what would be ideal. He’s a man. He’s trying to provide all we need and all I want. I know it. He is created to be my protector, my lover, my friend, the provider. I was created to be his helper, his crown, his trust…The heart of her husband trusts in her and he will have no lack of gain. 

Can you really be trusted with your husband’s heart?

He speaks strong, but I hear the longing. The longing to know that he pleases me. The longing to know that what he has provided at present really is present enough.  There are usually questions under questions. And our husbands at some point all curiously seek to see if they are living up to expectations. It’s not a sin or weakness necessarily there is a God-given drive to do well and good by their family, especially concerning the bride they love. It is a good desire that can spin all wrong to be sure, and the wife can be the one to spin it that way.

So what do you do when your husband comes asking what you want from life…? How do you take those questions answer honestly and treat his trusting heart well?

I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. Philippians 4:12

Most of us haven’t learned this secret. In America, the majority of us are all living in prosperity, in abundance and the natural bent of our hearts is to want more & more. Scripture calls it greed, idolatry most often and we call it planning for the future. We’re laying on our husbands a weight their souls cannot bear with all our wanting, with all our obsession with the next best whatever…. I don’t know a man alive who wouldn’t do better with a wife who had learned to be content in any and every situation. Of course, it could be your man that’s lost in the sin of greed and idolatry…your contentment could win him over. Perhaps when he beholds your happiness in your present situation, he will see that we shouldn’t deal in life based on our own desires, but rather on the will of God. It’s not a sin to buy this or that, so long as we are doing so in fellowship with our God.

The way we spend is setting us up for kingdom purposes or secular seduction. And you, the wife (or future wife), are going to be mighty in how all of this spins for your family. You could give your husband a gift today you know? The gift of a happy, easily contented wife who isn’t clamoring for more behind closed doors, but happy with what God has already graciously given. I think it was Elisabeth Elliot who said what you don’t have now you don’t need now. And friend that is truth.

You have your husband’s heart, handle it well. And speak words that give life…words of contentment are like that.